Writing Woes

Feeling things and actually writing them down are completely different realms. Sometimes I read other people's blogs, short stories, novels and think, that's not so hard. I could write that. I think those thoughts all day long. And yet, it is hard. Beyond hard. It is like swimming through sand. What is the right word? How will it come off after it is written down?

Creating is difficult, whatever the medium. It is the translation from what is on the inside to the outside world. And because everyone sees (hears, feels, reads) things differently, it is even more difficult to know whether or not what you have created is being perceived the way you meant for it to be - which, by the way, rarely happens. Not to mention, most of us have conflicting views within us.

So, if someone is trying to convey their opinion of how terrifying marriage is, the same reader could completely agree and, simultaneously, disagree. Therefore, the writer has to either be very convincing with the argument so the reader has no choice but to agree (or at least understand), or vague enough for the reader to interpret in what ever way he/she chooses.

So, all of these thoughts run through my mind before I even set pen to paper, making it nearly impossible to create one intelligible sentence. A teacher I had in the past told me in order to minimize this anxiety, just write. Write a bunch of junk until you hit your rhythm, then keep going. Later, come back and edit. Cut, re-word, and add. Check spelling, grammar, and punctuation.

It all sounds warm and fuzzy, but I can't do it. Can not. The only thing I can do is to keep trying. I guess I'll do it my way. My way is slow and leans very heavily on the "I can't do this" procrastination technique. Perhaps I'll publish when I'm in my 80s....