The Importance of a Friend

...and then he asked her the question no one knows how to answer. "Well then, what would be the perfect job for you?" And so, later, over a glass (or two) of amazing wine at Kir, we discussed it. What would it look like, feel like? How would it be to go to work every day knowing that you were making a difference? Contributing a part of yourself to the world? Do something you believe in? Something you could do that would allow you to answer the question 'what do you do' with pride...all this and still be able to pay your bills and maybe buy that skirt hanging in the window.

And from that topic, we, half buzzed and now fluid, moved along the line of questions that haunt the average twenty-something. What am I doing here (in this town, in this world, with this man, in this skin?) And after answering them the best we could, and playing the Devil's advocate on each others scenarios or declarations, we paid the bill, hugged that long lovely hug that means so much more than just a squeeze, that means I get you, I know how you feel when you are in a room full of people and still feel alone, or when you look up at the stars and feel minute, or gaze across the room at a stranger and wonder if their heart feels empty too. That hug meant thank you. It meant connection. It meant I'm so lucky to have you in my life.

on my nightstand

one of those books that makes it hard to put down and go to work...

i want too much

i feel like a million bucks...wanna feel?

I've been on the edge lately. Assuming I'll get sick any day now.
Not sleeping well. Staying out a little too late on Halloween (it was worth it!).

But yesterday brought all of that to an end. I went to the salon (Burnside Proper). My dear friend Twila pampered me. I ran errands. Got my boots fixed. Bought some new ones. Went grocery shopping after a long, long time of coping with empty fridge syndrome. Went for a run. Cooked myself a pile of veggies. Went to go see Kelly Bauman and then slept like a queen! I feel like a million bucks today!

sunday morning coming down

happy halloween

"Dream tonight of peacock tails,
Diamond fields and spouter whales.
Ills are many, blessings few,
But dreams tonight will shelter you.

Let the vampire's creaking wing
Hide the stars while banshees sing;
Let the ghouls gorge all night long;
Dreams will keep you safe and strong.

Skeletons with poison teeth,
Risen from the world beneath,
Ogre, troll, and loup-garou,
Bloody wraith who looks like you,

Shadow on the window shade,
Harpies in a midnight raid,
Goblins seeking tender prey,
Dreams will chase them all away.

Dreams are like a magic cloak
Woven by the fairy folk,
Covering from top to toe,
Keeping you from winds and woe.

And should the Angel come this night
To fetch your soul away from light,
Cross yourself, and face the wall:
Dreams will help you not at all."

— Thomas Pynchon

is it always going to feel this way?

the wind is running its fingers fiercely through the trees
outside my window and i wonder,
why is it always easier to be honest to a blank page?

Listen to Olsen Olsen by Sigur Ros